linuslive.com

Simply put, God gives us very few gifts.  But, like most gifts, it’s not really about the number of gifts but more about the quality.  The gift I’m going to focus on is his greatest gift: time.

Time is probably the most interesting gift God gives us.  If you think about it, it is an extremely finite resource.  Time is also the one thing we cannot control.  As much as we would like, we cannot turn back time, speed it up, or slow it down.  All of our days are numbered.  He knows to the microsecond when we will leave this world and enter the next.

Another interesting thing about time is that we cannot give our time to someone else: that is we cannot give someone two more weeks to live like we can give someone $200.  Time is measurable, but not tangible.  We cannot feel 30 minutes.  Of course, 30 minutes at the dentist’s office always feels longer than 30 minutes with great friends.  And no matter how much time you spend with them, it’s never enough.

I think too many people, Christians and those who aren’t, don’t see time in the way that God had intended.  Too quickly we say, “Oh, that’s something that I can do next week” or “I need to cancel because I need to do something else.”  Don’t get me wrong: there is responsibility when it comes to time management.

But I am suggesting is something far more simple.  Time is something we will never get back.  Unlike money, we can usually get a refund, earn more, and invest wisely (as far as God allows, of course).  When you look back on your day, how did you spend it?

Time is not something that we should throw away lightly.  It’s also something that we should joyfully share with others.  And when you do share it with others, make it meaningful.

After all, we only get once chance at it.  Make sure it matters.

Today is Easter.  For those who are unfamiliar with the holiday, Easter marks the day that Jesus Christ rose from the dead to show that he was truly God.  This post will not be a “praise Jesus” entry.  I feel that so many Christians only use this holiday to evangelize, when we are commanded to do so on an on-going, regular basis.  Instead, I’d like to focus on what this holiday means to me.

If you follow me on twitter or on facebook, you may know that I suffered a back injury about a month ago.  It’s been difficult for me to stand or sit for long hours at a time.  But this injury has actually been one of the most interesting experiences in my life.  I’ve been getting regular cortisone-steroid shots directly into my spine.  I now know what it feels like to get an epidural!  Women, I do not envy you.

But mostly, I’ve enjoyed the human interaction I’ve been having with the various medical staff.  For the most part, these are people who I’ll only interact with for a brief moment in time.  I know nothing about them, except the fact that they work there.  I don’t know if they have kids, they are divorced, just committed a crime, what their favorite ice cream is…  All I know is that for the next 10-15 minutes, I will be sharing a moment in time with them.

It dawned on me several years ago that behind every face is a story.  Behind that story, are emotions that we might not be able to comprehend.  Behind those emotions is a person, who is enjoying or hating life.  This person has real issues, or maybe not.  Has two dogs, or maybe two birds.  Has got three kids, or maybe just two.  Is a single parent or struggling through a marriage.

The point of this is that for these 15 minutes, I have the opportunity to add to her problems and frustrations, or I can treat her like a human being, talk to her, and have her feel like she is the most important person in the world.

When you go to the check out counter, how often do you think about the cashier’s life, wondering if he just had a fight with his girlfriend about the dinner he made last night?  When he looks at you angry, do you get angry too?  See, the reality is that so many of us don’t see pass the nameless faces of the people we see that we assume that anything that they do to us is because of us when in reality, that’s not true.  The guy that cut you off isn’t crazy; he’s on his way to the hospital to see a new child into the world.

So many people want to change the world.  But rarely do these same people want to change their world.  I can’t begin to tell you how much a smile does to someone who’s working in McDonald’s.  Or how wonderful some one’s voice sounds when I genuinely ask someone, “How’s your shift going so far?  Has it been busy?”  And yes, I do actually do this.

My encouragement to all Christians is to stop acting like these people only exist in your life for 15 minutes.  My encouragement to those who aren’t Christians is also the same.  Let’s not change the world: start by changing your world.  Together, the world will change itself.

With spring just around the corner, it seems that love is starting to saturate the air. Valentine’s day has passed and with wedding season around the corner, many of my friends are wondering if Cupid will nip them in the bud this year. And it seems like every year, I have conversations with many eligible bachelors about what they would like in a woman. Qualities like “good cook” and “hot body” are always at the top. At some point, usually after some debate as to other characteristics does the topic of spirituality come up. The conversation then trails a bit and then usually ends up at some sporting event.

The interesting thing about this conversation is how quickly its dismissed. Obviously, it something that many people think about. But what isn’t is the joys and benefits of being single. And I wonder why that is.

What is it about being single? Is it taboo? If you’re single, it seems like you’re the only one. If you’re married, you can’t help but play matchmaker. If your dating, you look to couples for advice. I ask again: what is it about being single?

I have never been asked for advice on how to keep single. It seems like everyone I talk to absolutely hates being single and wants desperately to be with someone. Don’t get me wrong: there is nothing wrong with wanting to be married or wanting to be with someone. What I am suggesting is that there may be something to this hatred to singleness that must be examined by every person, single or not.

I haven’t seriously dated someone in almost eight years. Does that surprise you? Not in the “You’re so hot, who wouldn’t want you” kind of way. It shocks most people I tell because they can’t imagine not having someone for so long. But I look at them and ask, “How many break-ups have you had in the last eight years?” Their answer usually shocks me.

In the last eight years, I can’t begin to tell you some of the greatest things I’ve learned not just about myself but about dating and marriage. And I wouldn’t trade those lessons for all the speed-dating in the world. I believe they are lessons that you only learn being single. You can learn them when your married or dating, but they typically have a negative effect on the relationship.

I’ve learned that being in a relationship takes honesty and trust. This may sound elementary but I can’t tell you the number of times I’ve seen relationships fail because of this reason. I’ve also learned that relationships require grace and demand humility. Without either, the relationship will fail.

Being single, I’ve learned how to spend time alone and enjoy it. I’ve taken vacations by myself. I’ve come to understand who I am outside of another person and not have another person’s personality influence mine.

I’ve learned how to handle my money. Since I’m single, I have much more disposable income. But that doesn’t mean I should just spend it unscrupulously. I have a savings account that can help me survive a month and I’m working on extending that to 3 months.

I love how I don’t have to “check-in” with someone. At the same time, I understand the love behind couples who want to know what their significant other is doing at any given moment in a day.

Patience is something that God has grown in my life. I’ve come to accept that God may bless me with a wife or he may not. And I’m perfectly fine with it. Really!

Not many people I know can say these things. I have met too many people who wish they waited to get married and no one who wished they got married sooner. I’ve heard too many people regret the relationships they had and no one regretting waiting for the right person.

Instead of dismissing singleness, shouldn’t we, instead, embrace it? We spend all our childhood wishing we were older. We spend our adult years reliving our childhood.

In the case of singleness, you have a choice.

Make it count.

I would like suggestions for future Crossword articles.  If you have an idea, please post in the comments!

Do you ever watch a movie so many times that you can recite it? What’s funny about this phenomenon is that I’ll watch movies that I absolutely know and still sit on the edge of my seat. For example, I recently watched Rumor Has It for the second time.  Granted, it’s not a movie I know very well but I know what happens in the movie.  I wanted Jennifer Aniston’s character to admit that she was in love with her fiancé.  It takes her several days in order for her do admit this but she had to sleep with another guy in order to find this out.

Being a former screenwriter, I’ve often wondered what would have happened if she admitted to her fiancé that she had doubts in the beginning of the movie.  Of course, it wouldn’t have made a good movie but that’s not the point.  But I think we all do this.  How often have you thought about how different your life would have turned out if you did something differently.

(continue reading…)