The other side of darkness
I was so stressed with everything going on in my life that I fasted yesterday. I was going to fast over a period of a couple of days but I didn’t think it was going to be safe. But I felt GOD really speak to me yesterday. It was one of the most powerful times in my life.
Yesterday morning, I prayed that GOD would just tell me that he loved me. I prayed that I would glorify him. I wrote yesterday, “I want what you had Jesus when you died on the cross. I want confidence knowing you are here with me, now, in your arms, just telling me that I am yours.”
I got that yesterday.
Despite having THE stressful day of this week (well, today isn’t finished yet), I really felt GOD’s peace. I prayed so much yesterday that I could really feel GOD’s nearness. It was majestic.
My prayer today: Allow me the same grace and stillness even with the food you provide. Lord, I remain focused on your cross and the cross that you ask me to carry. I want to carry it willingly, faithfully. GOD, I can only do that in your strength.
(For the curious: I found fasting over a few more days to be a bit unsafe because I expend a lot of energy in a day, from walking around everywhere. I realized last night that the hunger pangs last night was a lot more painful than I think they should have been. Maybe I need more faith to do it. Needless to say, I’m still excited about what GOD did yesterday.)
One of the things that I learned about fasting and prayer… is that God doesn’t remove the pangs… they don’t get less… in fact… they will get worse. But if God Willing, He will give you the strength to overcome those pangs.
Maybe God only wanted you to fast for that short amount of time.