Waiting for tomorrow
Wow, this is my first post via e-mail. I’m really starting to like paid LJ status!
I’m at my parents house now, unable to fall back asleep. Having finished Every Man’s Battle, I’m begun to realize the one minor flaw in the book: it was written primarily for MARRIED MEN! This is NOT a bad thing. I think if you don’t remember this when you’re reading the book, you can find the book really “black & white.”
The question I walked away with is what is a single man to do when he is attracted to a woman? I don’t think that question in answered in this book for a very good reason. Other books have got that covered. I need to remember to re-read the last section of this book when I get engage to prepare myself for the battle of marriage.
This book has allowed me to view marriage completely different. I want to fight for my wife. The last few chapters discuss how a woman leaves the protection of her father for something greater…and that most men
FAIL their wives in this area because they fight the battle of sexual purity. I’m still acting now like I would as if I were married. But the logical question that follows is “When do I know God is leading me to pursue someone?”
I started reading Boy Meets Girl to answer this question. (In the past 12 hours, I’ve already completed Every Man’s Battle and now I’m 1/3 through Joshua Harris’ sequal to I Kissed Dating Goodbye.) There is a section that deals directly with this question. Harris backs up my judgement to wait for GOD’s timing and his wisdom not only for the right timing, but also the right woman.
Thinking about this is way too easy, but actually living this out is another. I was praying this morning (in my vain attempt to fall back asleep) for God to answer my prayer. Why is it that I feel so ready for marriage, when the reality is that I am not? Most people would say that if you feel ready, you should go for it. I don’t think logically that makes sense.
Feelings can change. They can and what’s worse is that we don’t realize that they do. And so we make decisions on those feelings. God tells us time and again that we are to make decisions based on wisdom and patience. Feelings are neither of these.
Wisdom implies knowledge, which in turn implies facts. Patience implies waiting to see if the feelings are stable.
After reading the last chapter of Every Man’s Battle, I found myself so inspired to live for a marriage that does not yet exist in my life, but does exist in God’s eyes. And when that day happens, I hope that my marriage will not be a honeymoon…but will be a foundation in which future generations will see GOD.
I’ve been praying recently for GOD to prepare me now for marriage by any means necessary. I keep reading that if you can’t handle problems now while you’re single, the chances of you facing those some problems in marriage are HIGH and the likely-hood of failing is even greater! There are too many people, even in the church, that say that marriage will fix their problems. Marriage will not make them lonely. That someone will FINALLY say that they love them and want to be with them.
God says he is there. And I am ready for single-hood. I’m so confident in my singleness that I really have nothing to lose. And I think this is how Jesus lived his life. There is a life to live while being single. Playing Halo 2 until ungodly hours of the night (which I would never do), going sky-diving, travelling around the world…
I need to remember why I’m single: to experience God. Yeah, God will prepare me for marriage…but it will be through the vessle of seeking God. If I’m not seeking God in everything I’m doing, I’m not seeking marriage.
In his chapter about successful courtship, Harris offers this suggestion: We see marriage as the successful journey of courtship. I don’t believe this is true. If courtship is to determine if God is leading two people to marriage, a break-up as well as marriage seems, then, the courtship would be successful! The logical conclusions is NOT marriage! How quickly we can twist courtship around! If SEEKING GOD in courtship is your goal, the outcome does not matter. God cares far more about the journey than he does
about the result. And this is where it starts…
NOW, before courtship, before romance. When you seek GOD NOW, before the dates and rings and flowers and brownies…He will be your one. And then, he will provide you with someone so wonderful, that you can’t imagine life without them.
Four AM musings…Gotta love it!